Head Bowed – A Poem by Allison Grayhurst

The numbing curse
of resentment comes
to capture me
in its lumpy maggot-riddled
corpse, putting on my back
a burden I am aware of
I cannot keep.
And even though I wash and scrub,
daily cleansing myself of its
putrid stench, it returns, living,
climbing my shoulders into my hair.
I know the only clear path is forgiveness,
no matter my so-called-righteous-heart
cawing for justice. I know I will never
find peace this way, nor mercy
unless I can give it.

I am the one who need forgiveness
for allowing this monstrosity to suckle on
my spirit for so long.
I thought I was past it.
I thought I truly became a citizen,
sealing my covenant.
But it is here again,
raging like before, expecting
vindication.

I hope it is a ghost of its first-self,
still large but flimsy, visible
but lacking all density.
I pray I can overcome its devouring song
and show the love to others
that I myself have been given.

Open here, casting off
its angry cries,
its barbarian anguish
blocking my own way forward
into saving deliverance.

Visit Allison at http://www.allisongrayhurst.com.